The meaning of life

July 31, 2013

Recently, I’ve been pondering the purpose of our existence. So I typed “What is the meaning of life?” into Google, but received no definitive answer. My eleven year old, however, told me, “The meaning of life is searching for the meaning of life,” and I’ve been pondering that ever since.

42

** this is based on a conversation I overheard between my son and my daughter earlier. I love the sentiment, it seems to make sense somehow.

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A very English summer

July 30, 2013

“Come for lunch on Tuesday, we can eat outside,” I offered excitedly. The weather was hot and the nation was basking in glorious sunshine. But by Tuesday the skies had blackened and the rain was torrential. “Typical!” we agreed, for everyone knows an English summer can never be relied upon.

Video still 2 cropped

** the video below was filmed earlier from my back door. It’s been raining hard all afternoon and looks set to continue all night, and for much of tomorrow. A very English summer!

** this is my submission to the WordPress Weekly Writing Challenge, in which we had to embed a video in a post.

 

Fifty word classics #1

July 29, 2013

Life on the farm was hard. Poor conditions, a lack of food, too much work; the uprising was inevitable. Having chased off the humans, us animals were finally free. For a while life was sweet: community spirit and plenty to eat. Then things changed. Four legs good, two legs bad?

Pig

Power tools at dawn

July 28, 2013

Saturday. At last. I really need a lie in. It’s been a long week and I have a lot of sleep to catch up on. Hold on, what’s that? Sounds like a drill, or a chainsaw. What the…? It’s my neighbour. What’s he doing? Surely not. Power tools, at 8.20am?

Chainsaw

** this story is dedicated to my neighbour, who luckily I’m good friends with – you know who you are 😉

When I grow up…

July 27, 2013

…I want to be a doctor, or a television presenter, or a teacher, or an engineer, or a politician or a pop star. I do not want to have been married for ten years already because my parents made me. If that happens, I’d rather not grow up at all.

Nada

** this story is dedicated to Nada al-Ahdal, aged 11 (pictured)

My wife wasn’t pleased. “Where the hell have you been?” “I got trapped in a house.” “Likely story,” she sneered, waving her legs at me, “I’ve been laying eggs all day. What have you achieved?” She was right, I’d spent the day just looking for food and then eating it.

Blue bottles

What’s in a name?

July 25, 2013

So, George Alexander Louis. G.A.L. I wonder if the royals realised their son would share initials with these interesting organisations: the Greyhound Awareness League, the Guild of American Luthiers, and Grupos Antiterroristas de Liberacion, a Spanish government-funded hit squad? Gal’s also the name of Ray Winstone’s character in Sexy Beast.

Sexy Beast

Ray Winstone as Gal Dove in Sexy Beast

** sorry, I know this isn’t a story as such, more like the musings of my mind. Oh well.

Time peace

July 24, 2013

Out of the blue, the old living room clock stopped. It didn’t start again when I replaced the batteries, so I considered replacing the clock. But I liked it, so the clock stayed. The time in my living room is forever 23:23, content that it is right once a day.

Broken clock

It’s a…

July 23, 2013

While waiting for news of the royal arrival, rumour circulated that the fountains of Trafalgar Square would be lit up pink for a girl, blue for a boy, at which some took offence. Finally, the announcement came: “It’s a…” There was a pause. What? A boy, a girl? “…a baby!”

Royal baby

** this is another nod to the PinkStinks campaign, that targets the products, media and marketing that prescribe heavily stereotyped and limiting roles to young girls.

“I’ve never dated a professor,” she confessed. “It’s not as grand as you think,” he reassured her, knowing her degree was of the undergraduate variety. But then his phone rang. “Sorry, we’re on the verge of a major breakthrough and I’m in line for a Nobel prize.” She physically swooned.

Nobel prize